10 Things I Hate About My Best Friend

This article is about exactly what it says in the title , i.e.  “10 Things I Hate About My Best Friend”

1.  He is super calm whenever I’m angry with him. It’s like,  come on asshole,  fight with me.
2.  He is not as obssesed with TV shows as I am.
3.  He lives miles and miles away from me,  because of which we don’t get to meet as often as I’d like.
4. He gives me “space” when we are fighting(or when I’m screaming and yelling at him and he’s listening calmly), even though I don’t want him to give me space. I want you to fight back with me, bitch.
5. He’s super calm whenever I’m angry with him (see: previous point). Why you gotta be so sensible?  I don’t want to hear you perfectly reasonable logic. Nope.
6. He NEVER picks up the damn phone when he’s sleeping(He sleeps like the dead). Bitch,  I’m calling you at 3 in the morning,  I might be dying. Pick up the phone,  asshole.
7. He doesn’t dream. What? How?  Why?  Why don’t you have any dreams when you sleep?  How is this possible?  It really pisses me off to know that he’s sleeping peacefully,  when I can never fall asleep before having 2 hours of crazy,  weird thoughts in my head,  and when I do fall asleep those thoughts just invade my mind again in the forms of a dream.
8. He makes me laugh  when I cry – stop it,  dude.  Just let me cry out my frustrations every once in a while. You can let me cry sometimes,  okay?
9. He still won’t watch Supernatural (with or without me), even though I have been literally begging him for years now.  One show – he can’t give me the time of one show?  Some best friend you are.
10.  Most of all I hate the fact that I actually don’t hate anything about him (annoyed and angry at something,  to the level of actually fantasizing about killing him,  but I don’t hate anything about him).  I actually love him a lot and I’m very lucky to have him as my best friend.

 

P. S.  – I’m still pissed off about you not watching Supernatural.

P. P. S. – Consider this a heartfelt letter to get you to start watching Supernatural.  😜😜 (I said nice things about you – do this for all the nice things I said about you).